Moroles, Maria Christina - interviewed by Rose Norman
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Transcript
Transcripts may contain inaccuracies.
- | Okay don't go far from the phone. | 0:02 |
This is Rose Norman, | 0:04 | |
and it is October 27th, 2014, | 0:06 | |
and I am interviewing Maria Cristina Morales, | 0:09 | |
who's also known as SunHawk, | 0:13 | |
and who lives at Arco Iris, | 0:15 | |
near Ponca, Arkansas. | 0:17 | |
And she has sent me some topics | 0:22 | |
that we'll talk about. | 0:25 | |
Starting with our mission and vision, | 0:28 | |
this is Arco Iris mission. | 0:30 | |
Who we were back in 1976, | 0:32 | |
who we are now, | 0:35 | |
our mission and vision, | 0:36 | |
and where we're going, | 0:37 | |
our mission and vision. | 0:38 | |
So that's how you wanna organize it? | 0:40 | |
- | I think so. | 0:44 |
- | Okay, well what about it? | 0:45 |
Your mission and vision is the topic | 0:47 | |
of this interview, | 0:50 | |
so you wanna start at the beginning, in '76? | 0:53 | |
- | I'll give you a brief beginning | 0:58 |
by I had a vision | 1:03 | |
when I was living the city in Dallas, | 1:04 | |
I grew up in Dallas. | 1:07 | |
And I grew up in the ghetto | 1:08 | |
and to a large family, | 1:12 | |
traditional Mexican family. | 1:15 | |
And faced a lot | 1:21 | |
of struggle living in the barrio. | 1:22 | |
There's a lot of violence in our community, | 1:27 | |
'cause it was a ghetto. | 1:32 | |
It was a very common | 1:34 | |
for there to be violence everywhere. | 1:37 | |
And my parents had | 1:40 | |
to move us into a better place, | 1:41 | |
kind of on the edge of the barrio. | 1:44 | |
But things happen | 1:47 | |
and several things happened. | 1:51 | |
And to-teen, I was raped at 12 | 1:53 | |
and ended up leaving my home on account of that, | 1:58 | |
because I was pregnant. | 2:05 | |
And I was on my own | 2:08 | |
from the age of 13 after I had the baby. | 2:10 | |
I came back | 2:14 | |
and realized that I couldn't live | 2:16 | |
with my parents. | 2:19 | |
Before that happened to me, | 2:20 | |
they had been very loving, empowering parents. | 2:23 | |
But in our culture | 2:29 | |
and I'm ideal to start, | 2:33 | |
by the way. | 2:34 | |
And with our culture | 2:36 | |
when a young woman is violated like that, | 2:37 | |
doesn't matter what happens, | 2:41 | |
most the of the time it doesn't matter. | 2:46 | |
And I think | 2:48 | |
because my parents were young | 2:48 | |
with their economic situation and everything | 2:51 | |
that it just became very stressful | 2:54 | |
but I realized that I've gotten everything | 2:56 | |
that I needed from them | 3:00 | |
and was time for me to move on. | 3:02 | |
Because their way of dealing | 3:04 | |
with me had completely changed, | 3:07 | |
I have disgraced the family. | 3:10 | |
And I had always been very esteemed, | 3:15 | |
involve my brothers and sisters. | 3:21 | |
High esteemed taught everything about independence | 3:23 | |
and pride in our culture | 3:29 | |
and who we were. | 3:31 | |
So it was such a dramatic change | 3:32 | |
that my spirit knew | 3:35 | |
that this wasn't gonna work, | 3:36 | |
and I left. | 3:39 | |
So during that time after that, | 3:41 | |
I began to serve on the street | 3:45 | |
with other street people. | 3:49 | |
And since I was so young, | 3:52 | |
people kind of took me under their wing. | 3:55 | |
And I was very protected, | 3:58 | |
not that things didn't happen | 4:02 | |
but I felt very protected | 4:03 | |
and I felt that this was better for me. | 4:05 | |
So I found a new freedom | 4:10 | |
of living that way. | 4:12 | |
But right after I left, | 4:14 | |
about three years after I left | 4:16 | |
my brother who was a gang member, | 4:18 | |
was 18, was murdered. | 4:22 | |
And I came back to my family, | 4:26 | |
I had been estranged from my family. | 4:30 | |
And I saw them up-front, | 4:35 | |
how vulnerable they were. | 4:38 | |
And how broken they were | 4:40 | |
by what had happened. | 4:43 | |
And I realized, | 4:45 | |
not only that | 4:46 | |
but how broken they were | 4:47 | |
by my absence | 4:49 | |
and my lack | 4:51 | |
of giving them forgiveness | 4:52 | |
for the mistakes they made | 4:54 | |
and how they treated me. | 4:56 | |
And I realized | 4:59 | |
that I needed to forgive them | 5:00 | |
and move on | 5:02 | |
and be a service to them as a daughter, | 5:03 | |
be a daughter again. | 5:08 | |
And so I returned somewhat | 5:11 | |
to my family. | 5:14 | |
My parents weird as though their tragedy, | 5:16 | |
moved away from Dallas. | 5:20 | |
Moved back to | 5:21 | |
where we came from in South Texas. | 5:22 | |
And even though I was returning, | 5:25 | |
I was again alone. | 5:30 | |
But I got married at the age 15 (laughs), | 5:34 | |
went to Mexico and got married. | 5:39 | |
As a way to have autonomy | 5:41 | |
because I was getting picked up all the time | 5:44 | |
for flagrancy as a minor, | 5:47 | |
and put in juvenile detention. | 5:49 | |
So I know a lot of stuff on the streets, | 5:51 | |
as for my parents, | 5:54 | |
parents were incredible. | 5:55 | |
And the reason I'm telling you all this is | 5:57 | |
because I feel like | 5:59 | |
that is what led to this vision | 6:00 | |
that the then-to-come scene in my dream. | 6:04 | |
And there was a dream | 6:07 | |
that I started having. | 6:08 | |
During that time | 6:15 | |
when I was recovering | 6:16 | |
from my brother's murder, | 6:19 | |
recovering from my own rape | 6:21 | |
and all of that. | 6:24 | |
This dream began to come me | 6:26 | |
and it was just out of the blue. | 6:28 | |
And it was a recurring dream. | 6:29 | |
And in this dream I was on a mountain top. | 6:33 | |
Standing alone, looking down | 6:38 | |
to a valley. | 6:42 | |
And the valley like a city, | 6:43 | |
but the city was like a war. | 6:47 | |
And I could hear shooting | 6:52 | |
and bombs exploding | 6:59 | |
and could hear people crying out | 7:01 | |
and it was just a terrible thing | 7:04 | |
that I was watching | 7:07 | |
from a safe distance. | 7:09 | |
And I felt saddened by it | 7:12 | |
but I felt the faith, | 7:15 | |
but I was. | 7:17 | |
And so this dream kept reoccurring | 7:18 | |
that I was standing on this mountaintop. | 7:20 | |
Looking on to this chaotic seen | 7:25 | |
of the city. | 7:27 | |
And I began to think | 7:28 | |
and dream of leaving this city | 7:30 | |
and finding that mountain. | 7:34 | |
That mountain turned out | 7:37 | |
to be this mountain. | 7:38 | |
And there's a long story to it | 7:42 | |
and it would take too long | 7:45 | |
to tell you everything. | 7:47 | |
I-got-sick that I took | 7:51 | |
to Austin, Texas. | 7:53 | |
I was on the street again. | 7:55 | |
I would go to Austin | 7:58 | |
when I needed a break. | 7:59 | |
And I think I was about 18. | 8:01 | |
I had already had my daughter | 8:05 | |
but periodically I'd had an arrangement | 8:08 | |
with my husband before I married him. | 8:12 | |
We were both 17 | 8:14 | |
and I'm 15, | 8:17 | |
and he was 17, | 8:19 | |
we were both very young. | 8:20 | |
And I told him, | 8:22 | |
as long as you never ever | 8:24 | |
tell me what to do | 8:25 | |
or try to control me, | 8:27 | |
and he agreed. | 8:30 | |
And he didn't have a mother, | 8:32 | |
his mother had died. | 8:35 | |
And his father was a Skid Row alcoholic. | 8:36 | |
And he became my best friend | 8:40 | |
and we were best friends. | 8:43 | |
And we've decided | 8:43 | |
that was the best way for us | 8:44 | |
to keep from getting filed into juvenile detentionary, | 8:47 | |
trying the police to catch us. | 8:51 | |
And so we did, | 8:54 | |
we went to Mexico | 8:55 | |
and got married. | 8:56 | |
But even then I would leave, | 8:57 | |
when I would feel struggles. | 9:00 | |
I would take a road trip, I'd say. | 9:02 | |
I have to take a road trip | 9:04 | |
and I would leave, | 9:06 | |
and I would clear my head | 9:07 | |
by going to Austin. | 9:09 | |
And would drive to Austin, | 9:11 | |
and on one of those journeys, | 9:12 | |
I got sick. | 9:15 | |
And the ti-ta there | 9:18 | |
that secure the people on the street | 9:21 | |
took them lunches. | 9:22 | |
There's a young couple | 9:24 | |
and they took me in | 9:26 | |
and they took me into their house. | 9:27 | |
And they told about this land | 9:28 | |
this very land that I'm on, | 9:30 | |
who-am-I to screw it up? | 9:33 | |
They told me about this land | 9:36 | |
and they said there's a community | 9:37 | |
that lives way back in the mountains. | 9:39 | |
And we're gonna go move there | 9:42 | |
and you don't have to pay | 9:45 | |
to live there. | 9:46 | |
And it's incredible beautiful place | 9:49 | |
and I was sick, | 9:51 | |
with a fever | 9:52 | |
and I was listening | 9:53 | |
to their story as I recovered | 9:54 | |
and they told all about their trip. | 9:58 | |
And they said if you ever wanna go, | 10:00 | |
we'll be there. | 10:03 | |
So they told me, | 10:06 | |
they didn't know the address. | 10:07 | |
They told me that I could reach them | 10:10 | |
if I went to the ko-wah. | 10:12 | |
a natural foods club in Fayetteville. | 10:14 | |
And that they periodically | 10:16 | |
would be going into town to work. | 10:18 | |
And so I began that journey | 10:20 | |
of saving money to move. | 10:25 | |
And I kept having that same dream. | 10:30 | |
Before they told me about the mountain | 10:33 | |
and after I realized | 10:37 | |
I said that must be the mountain | 10:40 | |
I'm supposed to go to. | 10:42 | |
I came and it took about six months | 10:45 | |
for me to run into them at the club, | 10:48 | |
but I got a job there. | 10:50 | |
And I waited. | 10:53 | |
I'm very good at waiting for things. | 10:54 | |
And so I waited | 11:00 | |
and got a job | 11:01 | |
my was there | 11:02 | |
and they showed up one day. | 11:03 | |
They told me how to get there. | 11:07 | |
So my husband was with me at the time. | 11:12 | |
And we were about ready | 11:15 | |
to break up at that point. | 11:17 | |
He had gotten | 11:20 | |
to be a heavy drinker like his dad. | 11:21 | |
He was not in a good way, | 11:25 | |
he's the sweetest person, still is. | 11:27 | |
But he became an endangerment | 11:30 | |
to my daughter and I. | 11:35 | |
So he took off one day | 11:37 | |
to go get cigarettes with my daughter | 11:41 | |
and didn't come back. | 11:43 | |
And I waited up all night worrying | 11:46 | |
and they finally showed up the next day. | 11:48 | |
And he had gotten drunk, | 11:51 | |
and he had a two year old with him. | 11:54 | |
- | Wow. | 11:56 |
- | And that was it, | 11:57 |
that was it. | 12:00 | |
As much as I loved him | 12:01 | |
and as much as I cared for him. | 12:02 | |
His family and we had been family | 12:05 | |
to each other | 12:09 | |
for almost 10 years at that time. | 12:09 | |
I feared for him | 12:13 | |
that I could not allow him | 12:14 | |
to endanger my child, | 12:16 | |
that was where the buck stops. | 12:19 | |
I divorced him | 12:25 | |
and he went backpacking to Dallas | 12:27 | |
and I stayed. | 12:30 | |
And but before that happened | 12:33 | |
we went out to that land with a friend. | 12:35 | |
And when I came here, | 12:39 | |
I saw the community | 12:43 | |
that was living here. | 12:44 | |
And it reminded too much | 12:46 | |
of the chaos in Dallas, | 12:48 | |
that I had left. | 12:52 | |
And there were just different comm-yum. | 12:55 | |
And there was doing drugs and alcohol | 12:59 | |
and you know, | 13:02 | |
playing Indian and praying | 13:05 | |
witches and do-al, | 13:08 | |
all kinds of different hats. | 13:11 | |
I was not interested one ioata in that. | 13:16 | |
But the meaning I drove out | 13:21 | |
to that mountain | 13:23 | |
my heart just opened. | 13:24 | |
It just was like I'm home. | 13:27 | |
I knew I was home. | 13:29 | |
I never saw more beautiful | 13:32 | |
than that road. | 13:34 | |
The road was a dirt road, | 13:36 | |
it was beautiful beautiful road. | 13:38 | |
Of just these huge oak trees | 13:42 | |
and every kind of hardwood tree, | 13:44 | |
and I just was in love. | 13:47 | |
And then when I met the community I was like ugh. | 13:48 | |
I just spent. | 13:52 | |
And I went back to Fayetteville | 13:55 | |
to cry about it basically. | 13:59 | |
And they-ground, | 14:04 | |
there's no way I'm gonna live like that, | 14:05 | |
with those people. | 14:09 | |
It wasn't what I saw | 14:12 | |
but there was still in the a midst | 14:14 | |
of the chaos | 14:16 | |
they just brought it out to the woods. | 14:17 | |
So I want back to Fayetteville | 14:22 | |
and I ended up getting into a relationship | 14:26 | |
with a woman | 14:31 | |
after my husband left, | 14:33 | |
a dear friend. | 14:34 | |
We've been friends for a couple of years | 14:35 | |
and she said, | 14:37 | |
"You need to come out | 14:40 | |
"To land it's change. | 14:41 | |
"Since you were there. | 14:43 | |
"And it's womens land now." | 14:44 | |
So again my heart opened | 14:47 | |
and my thought inwards about two years. | 14:48 | |
And I thought well, | 14:51 | |
I'm gonna try it again, | 14:53 | |
and I went out. | 14:54 | |
Again and she wasn't there | 14:55 | |
when I went. | 14:56 | |
And this women, | 14:57 | |
Esther Martinez went with me. | 14:58 | |
And we were greeted at the gate | 15:02 | |
by these very hostile women. | 15:04 | |
Lesbian women, that said, | 15:10 | |
"Who are you? | 15:15 | |
"And what do you want?" | 15:16 | |
And I told them | 15:18 | |
that we were friends of Shy-ner Core-doze-el. | 15:19 | |
And she had invited us to come here. | 15:24 | |
And they said, | 15:26 | |
"Well she's not here." | 15:27 | |
And so once again, | 15:29 | |
I saw this land of not welcoming, | 15:32 | |
and I was heartbroken. | 15:35 | |
And this one woman that was there, | 15:39 | |
her name was Berry. | 15:42 | |
And she was from Germany. | 15:43 | |
And she came up to me | 15:45 | |
and she says, | 15:46 | |
"I was here when you came the first time, | 15:47 | |
"And I saw you leave heartbroken. | 15:51 | |
"And I see you again, | 15:56 | |
"And I believe that you do belong here." | 15:58 | |
And I spoke to her | 16:02 | |
and we talked | 16:05 | |
and she said, | 16:06 | |
"There is a piece of land." | 16:07 | |
I told here what was my concerns | 16:08 | |
and my sadness. | 16:10 | |
And she told me, | 16:12 | |
she was a nurse. | 16:13 | |
"There's land at the other side | 16:16 | |
"Of the creek that belongs to Sae-sah-fraz. | 16:17 | |
"You could live there. | 16:22 | |
"Off the community, | 16:26 | |
"Away from this community." | 16:28 | |
So I went away again | 16:32 | |
when I had that in my mind. | 16:34 | |
Oh where I'm gonna be, | 16:36 | |
maybe that is where I should be. | 16:38 | |
She told me how to get there. | 16:42 | |
So I decided to go ahead | 16:44 | |
and take that walk, | 16:47 | |
she just gave me directions. | 16:48 | |
"Go over to this cabin | 16:51 | |
"And then walk down to the creek, | 16:53 | |
"And then cross the creek, | 16:55 | |
"And walk up the other side of the mountain." | 16:56 | |
This is a long journey, | 16:58 | |
and I have a four year old. | 17:01 | |
But I did it anyway | 17:05 | |
and I got here, | 17:07 | |
and I felt that again my heart open. | 17:08 | |
And I end up, | 17:15 | |
maybe this is the place. | 17:16 | |
This place there's nothing here | 17:18 | |
but there was peace. | 17:21 | |
And I thought, | 17:25 | |
maybe this is the place. | 17:27 | |
So I had went back to the city. | 17:32 | |
I told my girlfriend | 17:37 | |
that I've gone there, | 17:39 | |
what had happened. | 17:40 | |
And she was very apologetic of course. | 17:41 | |
And women mess-that-separatist-stage, | 17:45 | |
a lot of lesbians back in '75, | 17:50 | |
back in that time women were coming out | 17:56 | |
and they were taking back their power, | 18:01 | |
and they felt like they needed | 18:05 | |
to isolate themselves | 18:07 | |
and protect what they had. | 18:08 | |
It's just part (audio drops)nature. | 18:13 | |
Part of our bringing the pendulum back into balance. | 18:17 | |
But it kind of went to | 18:21 | |
that real extreme | 18:22 | |
of being real separate. | 18:24 | |
And presto, detective. | 18:28 | |
And I understood that I didn't want it. | 18:31 | |
I didn't want that. | 18:34 | |
And so anyway, | 18:37 | |
what happened was that I went to town | 18:40 | |
and there was an epidemic, | 18:43 | |
and I got sick. | 18:45 | |
I was one of the last people | 18:46 | |
to get the hepatitis epidemic. | 18:48 | |
We had epidemic in Fayetteville. | 18:51 | |
It went through the alternative communities, | 18:54 | |
it started in the restaurant. | 18:56 | |
This woman changed a diaperd, | 18:59 | |
this baby had hepatitis | 19:01 | |
and it went from there. | 19:03 | |
And the whole community got it, | 19:04 | |
I mean hundreds of people. | 19:06 | |
And I was trucking, | 19:09 | |
I was a trucker at the time. | 19:11 | |
And I hadn't gone back | 19:14 | |
to the land since then. | 19:15 | |
And my partner at the time was a | 19:18 | |
one of the collective women | 19:22 | |
that owned the property, | 19:25 | |
it was in a trust | 19:27 | |
of seven women, | 19:29 | |
and she was one of them. | 19:30 | |
But she would go out, | 19:32 | |
and told her, | 19:34 | |
"No I don't wanna go." | 19:35 | |
But when I got sick, | 19:38 | |
they had created different healing ha-zars in town. | 19:42 | |
And the women's community created their own. | 19:47 | |
We had a children's health, | 19:50 | |
where children went | 19:52 | |
for day care in the lesbian community, | 19:54 | |
and we also had a house | 19:57 | |
where women were being cared for. | 20:00 | |
And there was also women on the land here | 20:05 | |
access for us | 20:07 | |
that were caring for the women | 20:08 | |
that had come done with the hepatitis. | 20:12 | |
So I told my partner, | 20:15 | |
"Just don't take me out there." | 20:17 | |
But she came home one day | 20:20 | |
to find me passed out on the floor | 20:22 | |
burning a fever | 20:24 | |
and she took me, | 20:26 | |
and I with some other women | 20:29 | |
that carried me into the van | 20:29 | |
and I wake up, | 20:31 | |
and I'm here at Sesa-traz. | 20:32 | |
- | Wow. | 20:34 |
- | And that's a long story | 20:37 |
that I won't go into | 20:38 | |
because it was long | 20:39 | |
but it was during | 20:41 | |
that time did that vision, | 20:42 | |
the vision for this place became crystal clear. | 20:45 | |
And that's why I had | 20:49 | |
to take you through that long journey. | 20:50 | |
When I was very very ill. | 20:53 | |
Barry the woman | 20:55 | |
that had told me about the land on | 20:56 | |
the other side took care of me. | 20:59 | |
And I told her, | 21:07 | |
I sent my daughter home to Texas | 21:08 | |
because I was so sick, | 21:12 | |
I thought I was gonna die. | 21:13 | |
And she was afraid that I was gonna die | 21:17 | |
and she said you need to go | 21:19 | |
to the hospital. | 21:20 | |
And because what happened | 21:21 | |
to me in the hospital before | 21:24 | |
that I didn't cover, | 21:26 | |
but I had decided that I would never go | 21:28 | |
to the hospital again. | 21:30 | |
That I would die on the land | 21:32 | |
and I thought that this was the mountain | 21:34 | |
and I said, | 21:37 | |
well maybe that's it. | 21:37 | |
This is as far as I'd get, | 21:39 | |
I get to the mountain. | 21:41 | |
But anyway she took care of me. | 21:43 | |
And during her caretime I died. | 21:47 | |
And I had a vision in my death. | 21:52 | |
And it was all about this land. | 21:55 | |
And was that being on that mountain. | 21:58 | |
And she was here on this mountain. | 22:01 | |
And was praying | 22:05 | |
that I was going to start my life anew. | 22:06 | |
And that I had a mission, | 22:11 | |
and the mission was | 22:16 | |
that this would be a sanctuary | 22:18 | |
a safe space for women | 22:20 | |
and children of color. | 22:22 | |
That's where it began. | 22:26 | |
And I come back from that death | 22:28 | |
and I began. | 22:32 | |
And after when I got well enough, | 22:34 | |
I came over here | 22:36 | |
where I live now at Rancho Arco Iris. | 22:38 | |
And just to give you a broad overview, | 22:43 | |
years later the land was put into mine | 22:48 | |
and Esther's name. | 22:52 | |
After I had a counsel, | 22:54 | |
I counseled with the seven | 22:55 | |
co-owners, the trust, the collective. | 23:01 | |
That's what they were called, the collective. | 23:09 | |
And I had meeting them | 23:11 | |
and told them | 23:12 | |
that I had been given this vision | 23:13 | |
and they have been there when I died | 23:15 | |
and came back to life. | 23:18 | |
And so they're freaked out about me a little bit. | 23:20 | |
And they decided | 23:24 | |
that they would give us this land, | 23:25 | |
for that vision. | 23:27 | |
And so they turned over that land, | 23:28 | |
this land that I live on. | 23:33 | |
And we put it in Esther | 23:35 | |
and my name. | 23:37 | |
Although Esther never spoke up | 23:39 | |
for the land | 23:40 | |
and didn't have that vision, | 23:41 | |
at the time I thought | 23:43 | |
I don't believe in | 23:45 | |
only on my bill, never have. | 23:47 | |
And in the vision | 23:52 | |
it wasn't gonna own it. | 23:53 | |
It was just I would be here | 23:56 | |
to heal myself, | 23:58 | |
of my wounds | 24:00 | |
of through my life | 24:04 | |
and up to that point. | 24:06 | |
And to provide a sanctuary | 24:08 | |
for the women | 24:10 | |
and children to come. | 24:11 | |
So became a survival camp, | 24:13 | |
for women and children of color, | 24:15 | |
and that's how we began. | 24:17 | |
- | Woo, gosh that is quite a story. | 24:20 |
- | That's the greatly abbreviated version. | 24:25 |
- | Yeah I can tell, | 24:31 |
I wanna come out there | 24:32 | |
and visit you | 24:32 | |
and hear the whole story, | 24:33 | |
which I think will probably take some time. | 24:35 | |
I'm not a woman of color, | 24:38 | |
am I allowed to come out there? | 24:39 | |
- | I guess, that's where we begin is | 24:42 |
where I wanna tell you, | 24:45 | |
where we begin. | 24:46 | |
- | Okay. | 24:48 |
- | And it was very important | 24:49 |
that we began that way | 24:50 | |
because as a women of color | 24:52 | |
being raised by my parents, | 24:57 | |
that were in Texas | 25:00 | |
being a Mexican Indian | 25:03 | |
was as bad as being black. | 25:06 | |
It was sad. | 25:11 | |
There was No Mexicans Allowed signs, | 25:12 | |
when I was little. | 25:18 | |
There was same kind of racism | 25:22 | |
and all my teachers were white | 25:25 | |
and they were racist. | 25:27 | |
I could tell you | 25:29 | |
of all the teachers | 25:31 | |
that I had in grade schools, | 25:31 | |
'cause I only went | 25:36 | |
through the seventh grade. | 25:37 | |
Only one, was not. | 25:38 | |
One, a sixth grade teacher. | 25:43 | |
And she was very loving and kind. | 25:47 | |
And yes, but I knew in order | 25:56 | |
for us to regain | 25:58 | |
who we are, | 26:03 | |
we need to isolate ourselves. | 26:04 | |
We didn't even know | 26:06 | |
who we were | 26:07 | |
without someone bossing us around | 26:08 | |
and putting us down, | 26:10 | |
we really didn't. | 26:13 | |
And I realized all of that, | 26:14 | |
and I felt like we had to be alone here, | 26:17 | |
to really force that all out. | 26:21 | |
So we did, so we did. | 26:31 | |
You know women came, | 26:37 | |
at first many women came | 26:39 | |
because at there was a big adaptive-land movement, | 26:40 | |
back in the '70s. | 26:45 | |
And gypsy women came, | 26:47 | |
and women of color came | 26:53 | |
that heard about us | 26:54 | |
through the different articles, | 26:56 | |
you know word of mouth. | 27:00 | |
And the festivals, | 27:01 | |
we used to go to Michigan. | 27:02 | |
I went to Michigan, | 27:05 | |
you know back in the beginning. | 27:07 | |
And there was women of color-tent | 27:09 | |
and I was always eat there. | 27:12 | |
So women were coming | 27:14 | |
and that's where a lot | 27:18 | |
of women heard it word of mouth, | 27:21 | |
and they were all wounded. | 27:27 | |
We were all still wounded, | 27:31 | |
and it was crazy (laughing). | 27:34 | |
And we didn't have any money. | 27:39 | |
And here's us, | 27:41 | |
I was recovering from the hepatitis | 27:43 | |
because I went into liver failure | 27:46 | |
when I died. | 27:49 | |
I had this miraculous recovery, | 27:51 | |
but only to come back to life. | 27:56 | |
But my liver took two years to recover. | 27:58 | |
Two years of not being able to work. | 28:01 | |
- | Gosh. | 28:04 |
- | And then seven years total | 28:05 |
to really rebuild it. | 28:08 | |
So we lived on food stamps, | 28:11 | |
and out of tents and teepees, | 28:14 | |
and just lived here on the land | 28:19 | |
without running water. | 28:20 | |
It took us all the way back | 28:26 | |
to the beginning. | 28:28 | |
We had horses that we used | 28:32 | |
for hauling our stuff up the hill. | 28:34 | |
We went to the store once a month | 28:38 | |
when our food stamps came in. | 28:41 | |
And the rest | 28:45 | |
of the time we were here, | 28:45 | |
and learning to | 28:47 | |
how to grow a garden | 28:48 | |
and all that stuff, | 28:51 | |
But that's how we began. | 28:54 | |
So I wanted to share you that part. | 28:56 | |
- | Okay. | 28:59 |
- | The best part one. | 29:01 |
- | Okay. | 29:02 |
- | Now, part two. | 29:04 |
- | The second part, | 29:07 |
is what we became. | 29:09 | |
We had women come and go, | 29:12 | |
at first it was a lot more | 29:14 | |
and then it kind of got less and less. | 29:16 | |
Those women that had that dream, | 29:20 | |
found and tried it, | 29:23 | |
and it's not easy | 29:24 | |
to live the wilderness area. | 29:25 | |
They were urban women, | 29:27 | |
they're very skay-pee, | 29:30 | |
their traumas and tragedies. | 29:32 | |
I began to take care of children | 29:38 | |
because I had a little girl, | 29:40 | |
and there was all these women | 29:44 | |
that were coming here | 29:46 | |
that needed to get themselves well. | 29:47 | |
And so they would come and go, | 29:50 | |
and often leave their children with them. | 29:51 | |
And I loved it | 29:56 | |
because they gave my little girls, | 29:57 | |
somebody to play with. | 29:59 | |
And I actually preferred the children | 30:03 | |
to anybody else. | 30:05 | |
- | (laughing) Right. | 30:07 |
- | 'Cause of their innocence. | 30:09 |
But they were also very damaged. | 30:12 | |
From living with their mothers, | 30:15 | |
coming from broken homes, | 30:20 | |
and many were latch-key kids | 30:24 | |
that were often left alone. | 30:26 | |
And I found out about it, | 30:29 | |
and I just say, | 30:30 | |
why don't you just leave them here | 30:31 | |
for a little while. | 30:32 | |
You know, go figure it out. | 30:35 | |
They always say they needed | 30:38 | |
to go do something. | 30:39 | |
Go home to their parents | 30:40 | |
or go home | 30:42 | |
to their partner or whatever. | 30:42 | |
'Cause it wasn't easy living out here, | 30:45 | |
out of a tent. | 30:47 | |
And they were used to living in houses. | 30:49 | |
So they would leave their children, | 30:53 | |
and about five years. | 30:55 | |
The second year I was here. | 30:59 | |
The beginning of the second year, | 31:02 | |
my partner showed up. | 31:03 | |
Right before I died | 31:07 | |
my partner freaked out, | 31:09 | |
because she thought I was gonna die. | 31:11 | |
She knew I was gonna die, | 31:16 | |
I looked like death. | 31:17 | |
I was completely yellow, practically emaciated, | 31:21 | |
and because I was always been thin, | 31:25 | |
and when I had hepatitis hit me. | 31:29 | |
And that was the second time I had it, | 31:31 | |
I had it when I was really young. | 31:32 | |
I had gotten from the dirty needle | 31:37 | |
when I was doing drugs | 31:40 | |
when I was kid on the streets. | 31:41 | |
So my liver was already damaged. | 31:45 | |
And I had the hepatitis in my blood. | 31:50 | |
And so when I got it the second time, | 31:54 | |
it really hit me hard. | 31:56 | |
And, so I forgot to tell you that part | 32:00 | |
when she left me | 32:03 | |
and went off with this woman. | 32:05 | |
And a year later, | 32:08 | |
after I had moved here on the land, | 32:10 | |
she tuned-drag in her tail behind her. | 32:13 | |
I love her to death to this day, | 32:17 | |
she's passed on. | 32:21 | |
But she came back | 32:23 | |
and she was sorry. | 32:24 | |
And she told me | 32:25 | |
shse had gotten scared, | 32:26 | |
and she ran away. | 32:29 | |
She couldn't face the death. | 32:32 | |
And so she ran away, | 32:33 | |
she came back | 32:34 | |
and she said she loved me. | 32:35 | |
And we had been really good friends | 32:36 | |
prior to that. | 32:38 | |
Apart from being lovers | 32:39 | |
we were friends for two years. | 32:42 | |
So she came back | 32:45 | |
and lived with me. | 32:46 | |
We lived here for five years together. | 32:49 | |
She was Jewish, | 32:53 | |
Shy-ner Cordoza was her name, | 32:56 | |
so-for-her-jew. | 32:58 | |
And we were very different though. | 33:03 | |
We were from the opposite ends | 33:05 | |
of the economic scale. | 33:08 | |
She was from an upper class, | 33:11 | |
Jewish family from Minnesota. | 33:14 | |
I told her the vision, | 33:18 | |
and she was all for it. | 33:22 | |
And we began to work on it. | 33:26 | |
And as stewards, | 33:30 | |
I didn't believe the land was to mine, | 33:36 | |
it was just to share as a sanctuary. | 33:38 | |
But we needed to get it out sas-a-fras-name, | 33:41 | |
so put it in my name, | 33:45 | |
and mine and Esther Martinez, | 33:49 | |
and Esther left after a couple of years | 33:53 | |
but Chi-ner stayed. | 33:58 | |
And during that time | 34:00 | |
that Shy-ner was here | 34:01 | |
and left on the fifth year. | 34:02 | |
I met Miguela at Michigan. | 34:06 | |
And I wasn't looking for anyone at all. | 34:15 | |
But here was this woman | 34:21 | |
that was from New York City ghetto | 34:24 | |
from a large Cuban family. | 34:33 | |
And we ended up falling in love. | 34:40 | |
She came and started helping here. | 34:44 | |
And that's a long story | 34:47 | |
but we fell in love. | 34:50 | |
- | Was that before after she came there? | 34:53 |
- | After she came here. | 34:57 |
She was here for about six months | 34:59 | |
before cupid whipped me. | 35:01 | |
Cupid's arrows suck. | 35:05 | |
I had no idea, | 35:08 | |
neither did she | 35:09 | |
because I was in a relationship. | 35:10 | |
And when Shy-ner had gone to town, | 35:14 | |
her grandmother hasn't been living | 35:18 | |
with us for two years. | 35:19 | |
She had Alzheimer | 35:22 | |
and needed total care. | 35:23 | |
And we were getting paid | 35:25 | |
by her rich family $2,000 a month | 35:27 | |
to care for her. | 35:31 | |
And we had her set up in a trailer | 35:33 | |
and we we're still living in a teepee. | 35:36 | |
- | Wow. | 35:37 |
- | But we were using the money | 35:39 |
to build a house. | 35:40 | |
And upgrade the road | 35:43 | |
and do all kinds of stuff. | 35:45 | |
But Chi-ner was to town | 35:47 | |
with her grandmother | 35:49 | |
and the kids. | 35:49 | |
And Miguela and I | 35:52 | |
were working on this house | 35:53 | |
because Miguela asked if she could come | 35:54 | |
and work her in exchange, | 35:57 | |
help me build a house in exchange | 36:00 | |
for living here. | 36:01 | |
I told her yes | 36:03 | |
that I need help. | 36:04 | |
And so she came, | 36:06 | |
and we were up on the roof one day. | 36:07 | |
By ourselves here in the land | 36:10 | |
for several days. | 36:11 | |
So when somebody went to town, | 36:12 | |
they did all the chores, | 36:14 | |
they did all the laundry, | 36:15 | |
they got the groceries. | 36:16 | |
It took a couple of days. | 36:18 | |
Keep going, stay with friends in town. | 36:21 | |
While she got all that done, | 36:24 | |
and Miguela and I | 36:26 | |
had never been alone here | 36:28 | |
on the land together. | 36:30 | |
We were on the roof | 36:32 | |
with no shirts on, | 36:34 | |
putting on the rest | 36:36 | |
of the boards for the rafters, | 36:41 | |
decking, it was actually decking. | 36:45 | |
We're nailing the decking | 36:47 | |
down on the house | 36:48 | |
we were building. | 36:49 | |
And all of a sudden, | 36:52 | |
I swear to God it was like cupid hit me, | 36:54 | |
with an arrow. | 36:57 | |
And I looked up | 36:58 | |
and I looked at this woman, | 36:59 | |
and I was like, | 37:00 | |
that was it. | 37:03 | |
God, she was the most beautiful woman | 37:06 | |
I'd ever seen in the world (laughs). | 37:11 | |
I was just like, | 37:15 | |
oh my god, it's her. | 37:17 | |
The Creator sent me her | 37:21 | |
and I hadn't even noticed her in months | 37:22 | |
she's been here. | 37:24 | |
Working side by side | 37:25 | |
and I'm such a very driven person. | 37:28 | |
And very loyal | 37:33 | |
and all that good stuff. | 37:36 | |
That it happens, | 37:42 | |
I looked at her | 37:44 | |
and she looked at me. | 37:45 | |
She knew what had happened | 37:47 | |
because it hit her | 37:49 | |
when she saw the look in my eye. | 37:52 | |
And we we're working 10 feet away | 37:55 | |
from each other. | 37:57 | |
And she said she knew | 38:03 | |
when she went down | 38:04 | |
to the cabin that night. | 38:05 | |
That something major had happened, | 38:11 | |
it had to do with us. | 38:15 | |
And so anyway, | 38:18 | |
so that's when Miguela and I began. | 38:19 | |
And that was five years | 38:24 | |
after I first moved here. | 38:26 | |
And she was all onboard | 38:28 | |
and knew all about what our mission was. | 38:29 | |
It was to be a sanctuary, | 38:33 | |
and then it all began to change. | 38:37 | |
And we decided to have a baby. | 38:42 | |
'Cause we had a baby boy. | 38:45 | |
- | Wow. | 38:48 |
- | But we haven't taken care of boys, | 38:50 |
we weren't separatist in that way, at all. | 38:53 | |
And I never was a separatist even | 38:58 | |
with women coming here. | 38:59 | |
'Cause women would come, black women | 39:01 | |
but it was just known | 39:03 | |
that was women of color land. | 39:04 | |
That five women came | 39:07 | |
that we're from De-Boise. | 39:08 | |
The woman that helped me build the house, | 39:11 | |
that we're working on was a carpenter. | 39:14 | |
I wasn't a carpenter, | 39:17 | |
so I hired this friend | 39:19 | |
that was German woman. | 39:21 | |
Mebah, and we had white friends. | 39:25 | |
And they came here, | 39:29 | |
and they were not excluded. | 39:31 | |
But this known as women of color land. | 39:34 | |
So things began | 39:41 | |
to change when we had Mario. | 39:42 | |
Because we couldn't go | 39:45 | |
to Michigan anymore. | 39:46 | |
Because we we're about | 39:48 | |
to be separated from our baby. | 39:48 | |
(buzzing sound) | 39:51 | |
There was no way, | 39:54 | |
I delivered him the very room | 39:57 | |
that I'm talking to you from. | 39:58 | |
And I delivered him | 40:03 | |
because the midwife would not come | 40:04 | |
at the last minute, | 40:06 | |
because we were pagans. | 40:08 | |
And her husband forbade her. | 40:12 | |
At the last minute | 40:14 | |
her husband forbade her from coming, | 40:16 | |
like the last month. | 40:20 | |
And she already told him, | 40:23 | |
Della was a potential | 40:26 | |
difficult with birth. | 40:31 | |
Because she had very narrow hips. | 40:34 | |
And she just said, | 40:39 | |
I don't know, | 40:41 | |
I don't remember now. | 40:41 | |
Except she said there was a potential | 40:42 | |
that it could be a difficult birth, | 40:45 | |
and it was. | 40:47 | |
And after both | 40:50 | |
of them almost died on me and everything | 40:52 | |
and all of that. | 40:53 | |
That we went through with that, | 40:55 | |
there was no way | 40:56 | |
that we we're gonna go back to Michigan | 40:57 | |
and be separated from our child. | 41:00 | |
So we stop going to Michigan. | 41:02 | |
The flow of women lessened. | 41:04 | |
We would let women know we existed. | 41:12 | |
And somewhere I think it was in '92 | 41:27 | |
that we incorporated as a nonprofit. | 41:30 | |
I think I was '81 or two | 41:35 | |
or something, I don't remember. | 41:36 | |
- | And that's nonprofit? | 41:41 |
- | We became a nonprofit, | 41:43 |
but we had decided we were not going | 41:45 | |
to include the land in the nonprofit. | 41:47 | |
We had programming here | 41:51 | |
for on the land. | 41:52 | |
For women and children of color at first. | 41:54 | |
And then it began | 41:58 | |
to include rural disadvantage children. | 42:03 | |
Because I started having more | 42:08 | |
of our local children, | 42:10 | |
that would show up | 42:14 | |
needing a place to live. | 42:16 | |
So they weren't children of color, | 42:18 | |
not always but there was. | 42:22 | |
Like there was this one white lady showed up | 42:24 | |
with three half black, | 42:27 | |
half white kids. | 42:28 | |
And left them here and disappeared, | 42:32 | |
and for two weeks. | 42:36 | |
So we decided that we needed help | 42:41 | |
and so we incorporated, | 42:45 | |
so we maybe we could get more help. | 42:47 | |
We didn't have a phone. | 42:51 | |
We had to walk three miles | 42:52 | |
to freakin' mailbox. | 42:54 | |
And the closest phone | 42:56 | |
was nine miles away, payphone. | 42:58 | |
We had no electricity. | 43:04 | |
The nonprofit didn't help us all that much | 43:08 | |
except for when we went | 43:10 | |
to the Co-op | 43:13 | |
and would give us food and stuff, | 43:14 | |
for our events, | 43:17 | |
for camps for kids | 43:18 | |
and for women. | 43:21 | |
And that's how began things | 43:27 | |
to change as our community, | 43:28 | |
we began to see the community was changing. | 43:30 | |
Now we had a child with color, a boy. | 43:33 | |
And we wanted him | 43:39 | |
to have other children around | 43:40 | |
and whoever he needed, | 43:46 | |
whatever he needed. | 43:48 | |
And I had a daughter, | 43:49 | |
she was big when Mau-dee was born | 43:50 | |
she was already eleven, | 43:52 | |
twelve, I don't remember. | 43:57 | |
No, she was actually older than that. | 43:59 | |
She was like 16. | 44:02 | |
- | So he was born '87? | 44:07 |
- | He was the impetuous change | 44:10 |
here on the land. | 44:12 | |
As you read that article, | 44:19 | |
and as I read it refreshed my mind, | 44:23 | |
how disturbing it was to her. | 44:27 | |
That our dream didn't seem | 44:29 | |
to be coming true | 44:30 | |
the way she would hope. | 44:31 | |
Other women would leave, | 44:34 | |
they wouldn't stay. | 44:36 | |
And she became more | 44:39 | |
and more disheartened. | 44:40 | |
And she gave it a good go, | 44:43 | |
28 years is a good go. | 44:46 | |
We were married 28 years, | 44:51 | |
and she did her best. | 44:59 | |
And something was missing. | 45:02 | |
And she needed to go find it. | 45:09 | |
And she wanted me to go with her years. | 45:15 | |
She kept saying we need to go, | 45:18 | |
move back to town | 45:19 | |
and then we'll retire here. | 45:22 | |
She began to see this more differently. | 45:25 | |
But she had given so much, | 45:29 | |
she felt I needed to give back to her. | 45:30 | |
So she began to see it more as a resource | 45:34 | |
and she talked about things | 45:38 | |
that I didn't want to do, | 45:40 | |
that was really hard. | 45:42 | |
And we struggled more and more, | 45:45 | |
wanted to sell some of the land. | 45:47 | |
I don't think that I can continue right now. | 45:53 | |
- | Oh, okay. | 45:58 |
- | I might have to stop. | 46:01 |
- | We'll we've been going over 45 minutes. | 46:04 |
We could start back later, | 46:12 | |
you just wanna make another phone day? | 46:14 | |
- | Yeah, I got to | 46:24 |
work tomorrow and Wednesday. | 46:25 | |
And I know you have to get this done, | 46:29 | |
and maybe later on the day, | 46:31 | |
do you have time? | 46:34 | |
- | I'm tied up after six. | 46:36 |
But until 5:30 I'm free. | 46:39 | |
And I have Thursday free, | 46:48 | |
we could do it Thursday. | 46:49 | |
- | Let me think, | 46:53 |
let me look at my calendar. | 46:54 | |
How about one o'clock on Thursday? | 47:28 | |
- | Okay. | 47:32 |
I think Thursday, oop! | 47:34 | |
Did I lose you? | 47:35 | |
I didn't lose you did I? | 47:36 | |
I'm gonna look at my calender. | 47:38 | |
Thursday, oh wait a minute, one o'clock. | 47:41 | |
- | I have an eleven. | 47:48 |
- | Later would be better. | 47:50 |
I think can do one o'clock. | 47:51 | |
If I can't I'll call you. | 47:52 | |
(laughs) I'm sorry. | 48:02 | |
- | Go ahead. | 48:04 |
- | I have to go in | 48:06 |
for a sleep study Wednesday night | 48:07 | |
and they said I should keep Thursday open | 48:09 | |
in case they need to keep, | 48:11 | |
so I don't know if Thursday, | 48:13 | |
I forgot about that. | 48:14 | |
Let's just set one o'clock on Thursday | 48:18 | |
and I'll call you | 48:21 | |
if that's not gonna work. | 48:22 | |
- | Okay, alright. | 48:26 |
I think I just need a break from that. | 48:33 | |
- | Okay, and if you decide, | 48:36 |
it's almost four o'clock now. | 48:37 | |
So if you rally | 48:40 | |
and wanna continue this afternoon, | 48:41 | |
you can just call me back. | 48:44 | |
- | Okay, okay, thank you Rose. | 48:47 |
- | Okay, well thank you | 48:49 |
and I'll start working on this. | 48:50 | |
(hang up call beeping) | 48:53 | |
And this is Rose Norman, | 50:06 | |
I'm interviewing Maria Christina Morales | 50:07 | |
known as SunHawk, | 50:09 | |
and this part two | 50:12 | |
of that interview October 27th, 2014. | 50:14 | |
I was thinking maybe you can go back | 50:18 | |
to where you about | 50:20 | |
to say something about the beginning | 50:21 | |
of the second year. | 50:23 | |
- | Well I think they're some things | 50:27 |
that I wanted to include. | 50:31 | |
And the reason why we named | 50:33 | |
ourselves Aguile, means rainbow. | 50:37 | |
And rainbow indigenous people, | 50:42 | |
she's the Rainbow goddess. | 50:47 | |
And she's all the colors, | 50:49 | |
and she signifies healing. | 50:51 | |
And also signifies all the colors, | 50:56 | |
meaning all the colors | 50:59 | |
of the all the peoples. | 51:00 | |
This land has always been about all colors living together | 51:03 | |
but we as the indigenous women are the stewards | 51:10 | |
of the earth. | 51:17 | |
And as the indigenous daughters | 51:20 | |
that we should maintain the stewardship | 51:23 | |
of the land. | 51:27 | |
Are you following me? | 51:30 | |
- | Yes, yes. | 51:32 |
- | And it didn't mean that many people | 51:34 |
always wanted go there. | 51:37 | |
That it's exclusive of other people | 51:41 | |
but we must must always remember | 51:43 | |
that the people of color | 51:47 | |
are the most disenfranchised | 51:51 | |
from the most that-much-man-can of space. | 51:55 | |
We must remember | 52:01 | |
that was put in our trust | 52:03 | |
and to maintain that leadership | 52:05 | |
so that there's misunderstanding | 52:10 | |
that this is women of color only space. | 52:14 | |
- | I see. | 52:17 |
- | But it will be, | 52:18 |
and hope it will maintain | 52:19 | |
that the leadership will be maintained | 52:21 | |
by indigenous women of color. | 52:23 | |
And so that's why we are called Aguiles. | 52:31 | |
That's a very important piece | 52:39 | |
that is misunderstood often. | 52:45 | |
As you yourself said to me, | 52:48 | |
would I be welcome? | 52:49 | |
- | Right. | 52:52 |
- | Last night I had a young woman come | 52:54 |
that I've known since she was eleven. | 52:57 | |
And her partner just committed suicide, | 53:00 | |
and she's a white woman. | 53:02 | |
She's from Indian blood, Cherokee | 53:04 | |
a lot of the people around here | 53:09 | |
have Cherokee blood | 53:10 | |
because this is the | 53:11 | |
where trails-this-went through. | 53:12 | |
But for all-intuitive purposes | 53:17 | |
she's basically a white girl, | 53:18 | |
that raised that. | 53:22 | |
But I embrace her and loved her | 53:26 | |
and anyone that comes | 53:28 | |
to me is my sister or brother. | 53:30 | |
As a human, | 53:35 | |
I do not turn away men | 53:36 | |
or white people. | 53:40 | |
I don't turn anyone away, | 53:43 | |
if they come and ask me for help. | 53:46 | |
That is my vow as a healer, | 53:51 | |
to help as best as I can | 53:56 | |
with what I know. | 53:59 | |
And this land is a sanctuary to all, | 54:01 | |
but I must maintain that space | 54:04 | |
for the indigenous people | 54:09 | |
that are so displaced | 54:11 | |
and so marginalized. | 54:12 | |
So that's where there's a little confusion, | 54:16 | |
or much confusion I should say. | 54:20 | |
So you were saying | 54:24 | |
that I left off about something | 54:26 | |
about the first few years. | 54:31 | |
- | I think you were about | 54:35 |
to talk about something | 54:37 | |
that happened at the beginning | 54:40 | |
of the second year, | 54:43 | |
and then you backed out | 54:44 | |
to explain about it, | 54:45 | |
I forgotten to mention about the dying episode. | 54:46 | |
And the partner that left | 54:50 | |
when you were dying. | 54:53 | |
- | She came back. | 54:55 |
When she came back | 54:57 | |
I was here basically alone with Jennifer. | 55:03 | |
And because I knew her very well | 55:10 | |
at that time, | 55:13 | |
she told me | 55:14 | |
that her grandmother was very ill and dying. | 55:16 | |
And her grandmother had played a very important role | 55:22 | |
in her life. | 55:26 | |
And we ended up going | 55:28 | |
to visit her grandmother | 55:29 | |
and found she wasn't really dying. | 55:29 | |
She was a survivor of the Holocaust | 55:33 | |
and she thought she was in a interment camp. | 55:36 | |
And I suggested to my partner, | 55:44 | |
Shy-ner at the time, | 55:47 | |
that we should bring her here. | 55:50 | |
And her parents said, | 55:54 | |
"Y'all don't have any way | 55:56 | |
"To take care of her. | 55:57 | |
"You don't have any place for her to live." | 55:58 | |
They had her in a very nice nursing home. | 56:02 | |
And I don't know if this has | 56:07 | |
to do anything with all of this | 56:09 | |
but the fact that she came | 56:10 | |
to live with us helped financially | 56:13 | |
build this place. | 56:19 | |
Because they began to pay us, | 56:22 | |
we had to go | 56:28 | |
to Minnesota for nine months, | 56:29 | |
prove to them, | 56:31 | |
take her out of the nursing home, | 56:33 | |
take care of her, | 56:35 | |
they rented us an apartment, | 56:37 | |
and we took care of her for nine months. | 56:39 | |
And then they let us bring her back | 56:42 | |
in a travel trailer. | 56:45 | |
And she lived her on the land | 56:47 | |
and I told them | 56:50 | |
that I wanted to build a house, | 56:51 | |
this house that I live in now. | 56:54 | |
And they helped us with the initial cost | 56:56 | |
of building this house, | 57:01 | |
$5000 to get started. | 57:03 | |
And Brown that had anything | 57:08 | |
to do with this, | 57:10 | |
but Shy-ner was very involved | 57:15 | |
with the care of her grandmother, | 57:17 | |
although also we helped. | 57:19 | |
She's not very very involved | 57:25 | |
because it was a full-time job | 57:27 | |
to take of somebody | 57:29 | |
that's in her late 80s, | 57:32 | |
she was bedbound and all that. | 57:34 | |
It was a lot of work for us. | 57:38 | |
But it did enable us to upgrade. | 57:42 | |
And I don't know | 57:51 | |
I don't know what else, | 57:53 | |
I know wanted | 57:55 | |
to stay that two years out. | 57:56 | |
That was the vision about the rainbow, | 58:00 | |
had a lot to do with that. | 58:07 | |
And because I do talk about experiences of racism, | 58:11 | |
that still go on today. | 58:20 | |
And I-live-three, Austin, | 58:25 | |
because they take that too personally | 58:30 | |
I always say, | 58:32 | |
"If the shoe fits wear it, | 58:33 | |
"If doesn't throw it away." | 58:34 | |
There's a misunderstanding about that. | 58:43 | |
We had been living here | 58:49 | |
and building our home, | 58:55 | |
building a garden, | 58:57 | |
building our place. | 58:58 | |
We put everything in place | 59:01 | |
that's here now, | 59:03 | |
irrigation, our garden, | 59:04 | |
we put in pond. | 59:06 | |
And all these things, | 59:08 | |
solar, we finally got a phone, | 59:10 | |
antenna phone, | 59:14 | |
let's see Mario was three, | 59:22 | |
and that was 22 years ago | 59:25 | |
that we put in a phone. | 59:29 | |
I think he was three or four | 59:32 | |
when we put the phone in. | 59:34 | |
And we had an antenna phone | 59:36 | |
because there was no service | 59:38 | |
for three miles. | 59:40 | |
And I don't know what that's about. | 59:46 | |
That's the information I suppose. | 59:49 | |
- | I was interested in whether | 59:52 |
or not in one of those pieces in May's, | 59:53 | |
the well, you well dug | 59:58 | |
but it wasn't working | 1:00:00 | |
because you needed a generator. | 1:00:01 | |
- | The drill, first we did a hand-dug well, | 1:00:07 |
it didn't work. | 1:00:10 | |
The minute the men | 1:00:13 | |
without my knowledge put | 1:00:15 | |
an explosive in the ground, | 1:00:17 | |
it was done. | 1:00:20 | |
I was done. | 1:00:21 | |
They didn't tell me | 1:00:23 | |
they were gonna do that. | 1:00:24 | |
They had been digging by hand. | 1:00:25 | |
I hired these well-diggers, | 1:00:27 | |
these men to dig a hole | 1:00:29 | |
where I thought maybe we'd have water | 1:00:31 | |
and then I left back to my campsite. | 1:00:35 | |
And then I heard an explosion | 1:00:39 | |
and so that ended | 1:00:40 | |
that way of having a well. | 1:00:43 | |
'Cause I didn't want them putting off bombs | 1:00:45 | |
here of any sort. | 1:00:51 | |
And the thing, | 1:00:58 | |
we had wells-drillers | 1:01:00 | |
that drilled down to the earth | 1:01:02 | |
and was deemed much more gentle. | 1:01:04 | |
And they just had a drill, | 1:01:08 | |
and they drilled down to four inches, | 1:01:09 | |
six inches I think actually, | 1:01:12 | |
a six inch bit. | 1:01:14 | |
And then they tazed-it, | 1:01:16 | |
but they didn't hit water for 500 feet. | 1:01:18 | |
And they didn't have any way | 1:01:22 | |
to the only pumps at that time | 1:01:26 | |
were only guaranteed on regular power | 1:01:29 | |
not generator power. | 1:01:32 | |
The only homeowner, | 1:01:36 | |
I'm sure they did that for commercial, | 1:01:38 | |
but they didn't sell anything. | 1:01:41 | |
So we still have a well out there | 1:01:42 | |
that's 500 feet deep. | 1:01:47 | |
At this point | 1:01:51 | |
because we developed our spring, | 1:01:54 | |
and we have spring water | 1:01:55 | |
I haven't tried, | 1:01:58 | |
I haven't had the money | 1:02:01 | |
to invest in a different kind | 1:02:03 | |
of a pump | 1:02:05 | |
and try it with our solar power, | 1:02:07 | |
which probably would work on solar power. | 1:02:09 | |
Even that, the manufacturers | 1:02:14 | |
of the pump may say, | 1:02:17 | |
"I don't know." | 1:02:20 | |
I haven't investigated in decades. | 1:02:21 | |
We began to rely on our spring. | 1:02:26 | |
And it ran most years | 1:02:31 | |
until about 10 years ago, | 1:02:33 | |
the spring ran three seasons. | 1:02:34 | |
And we have three one thousand gallon tanks. | 1:02:41 | |
And three hundred gallon sentiment tanks, | 1:02:46 | |
that we installed to hold water. | 1:02:49 | |
So we never went back to that | 1:02:55 | |
due to lack | 1:02:58 | |
of resources I'm sure hardly. | 1:03:00 | |
- | Did thousand gallon tank hold spring water | 1:03:05 |
or rain water? | 1:03:08 | |
- | Spring water. | 1:03:10 |
- | Okay. | 1:03:11 |
- | Miguela and I started | 1:03:13 |
to hand out cistern next to our house | 1:03:15 | |
and built a hand cement tank in the ground, | 1:03:19 | |
that holds 900 gallons of rain water. | 1:03:26 | |
Or whatever you wanna put in it, | 1:03:31 | |
we can actually fill it up, | 1:03:32 | |
it only has a hand pump. | 1:03:35 | |
One of those that you push | 1:03:38 | |
with your hand connected to it. | 1:03:41 | |
So we have not used that | 1:03:46 | |
for drinking water | 1:03:50 | |
because we mostly fill it with rain water | 1:03:52 | |
and have it as extra. | 1:03:55 | |
We had a drought five years ago | 1:03:59 | |
that it was so extreme | 1:04:02 | |
that ponds went dry. | 1:04:05 | |
Our irrigation ponds almost dried up, | 1:04:06 | |
it was one of the ones that didn't. | 1:04:09 | |
It went down to eight | 1:04:12 | |
and a half feet deep | 1:04:15 | |
about a three quarter of an acre pond | 1:04:19 | |
that when the deepest part is eight | 1:04:23 | |
and a half feet deep, | 1:04:24 | |
it went down to about three feet. | 1:04:26 | |
But we mostly rely on | 1:04:32 | |
for watering our animals | 1:04:34 | |
from the pond water. | 1:04:38 | |
But now this year we had three seasons again | 1:04:42 | |
of rainy season | 1:04:46 | |
and that's to hold our water. | 1:04:47 | |
Those tanks fill up | 1:04:53 | |
and they continue to fill up, | 1:04:54 | |
they've continuously fill | 1:04:57 | |
as long as the spring is filling. | 1:04:58 | |
We have one whole season of three months. | 1:05:00 | |
About three months, | 1:05:06 | |
I don't know about four months | 1:05:09 | |
or whatever our season is | 1:05:10 | |
and it would run down. | 1:05:12 | |
Our tanks would run out | 1:05:15 | |
and we would have to haul water. | 1:05:17 | |
Actually we did this the first year | 1:05:24 | |
that we've gone back | 1:05:27 | |
to three seasons of water running, | 1:05:29 | |
the spring running | 1:05:33 | |
for three seasons. | 1:05:33 | |
But politically, | 1:05:40 | |
we are in two thousand, | 1:05:44 | |
we are asked four crazy-loop | 1:05:51 | |
for pays-up decision | 1:05:58 | |
to ask for the land | 1:06:01 | |
that had abandoned | 1:06:02 | |
that's-across the community | 1:06:04 | |
had been abandoned for 10 years. | 1:06:07 | |
And perchers were vandalizing | 1:06:09 | |
that property next to us. | 1:06:14 | |
And shooting and hanging out there. | 1:06:18 | |
It's right across from us, | 1:06:22 | |
and so we asked for that property. | 1:06:24 | |
There's a long story to it | 1:06:29 | |
but I'll just tell you we asked for that | 1:06:30 | |
from the owner. | 1:06:33 | |
And I actually became one of the owners | 1:06:38 | |
by ex my partner Shy-ner | 1:06:40 | |
was one of the collective owners | 1:06:43 | |
and she was the last one | 1:06:48 | |
to be asked to sign off with that land. | 1:06:51 | |
And when they did asked her to do that | 1:06:56 | |
they decided to put as her power of attorney. | 1:06:59 | |
So legally, it was owned by me | 1:07:04 | |
and the original purchaser | 1:07:08 | |
of the property. | 1:07:10 | |
And we decided to put into a nonprofit. | 1:07:12 | |
And that was 400 acres. | 1:07:16 | |
I had no idea what I was doing | 1:07:19 | |
when I did that, | 1:07:21 | |
I just followed the lead | 1:07:22 | |
of the guidance that I asked for | 1:07:25 | |
'cause that's a great responsibility. | 1:07:29 | |
Now the great burden for me as is that, | 1:07:33 | |
especially when I was in dela-gon. | 1:07:41 | |
Of trying to take care of | 1:07:44 | |
and doing the things | 1:07:49 | |
that need to happen there. | 1:07:50 | |
But that happened in 2000, | 1:07:52 | |
that that land is turned over to authorities. | 1:07:54 | |
And that is the only land | 1:07:58 | |
that is owned by the nonprofit. | 1:08:00 | |
- | Okay, and it's 400 acres? | 1:08:03 |
- | Of wilderness. | 1:08:08 |
- | Of wilderness. | 1:08:09 |
It's a wilderness land, | 1:08:11 | |
it was where the regional homestead, | 1:08:13 | |
the homestead is that bought this land. | 1:08:16 | |
He used to by it in 600 acre plots. | 1:08:18 | |
I think it's 620 acres | 1:08:24 | |
are his square, his section. | 1:08:27 | |
And back in the day when people got land | 1:08:31 | |
it would have a section, | 1:08:37 | |
and a section was 620 acres. | 1:08:41 | |
So the originals owners had | 1:08:45 | |
that much land | 1:08:48 | |
and they sold a little bit of it, | 1:08:51 | |
the collector also gave some | 1:08:55 | |
of the heterosexual, | 1:08:57 | |
one heterosexual couple | 1:08:59 | |
that had been living on the land. | 1:09:00 | |
They asked all the guys to leave | 1:09:04 | |
when the women took over. | 1:09:05 | |
But one heterosexual couple was living their | 1:09:08 | |
with their children. | 1:09:10 | |
And so, they gave them 48 days. | 1:09:12 | |
A little bit of the land was taken away | 1:09:20 | |
and about a hundred acres was removed. | 1:09:24 | |
About a hundred acres were saved | 1:09:30 | |
or something at some point | 1:09:32 | |
of that section. | 1:09:34 | |
But with Aguiles and Rancho Aguiles | 1:09:37 | |
which are land is called Rancho Aguile. | 1:09:40 | |
It's about 530 acres. | 1:09:45 | |
- | Okay together. | 1:09:51 |
So Rancho Arco reaches the original land | 1:09:52 | |
that you would have done? | 1:09:57 | |
- | Where I live. | 1:09:59 |
- | Where you live. | 1:10:00 |
- | That was the original land | 1:10:01 |
that I asked to reclaim | 1:10:03 | |
for indigenous women of color. | 1:10:07 | |
And that was originally 120 acres | 1:10:13 | |
and then we bought another 15 acres | 1:10:17 | |
where our spring is, | 1:10:22 | |
this money that we got | 1:10:25 | |
from lesbian-actual-resources. | 1:10:26 | |
It was 30 acres or 15, | 1:10:34 | |
I can't remember now. | 1:10:35 | |
It was an acreage there, | 1:10:37 | |
maybe it was 30 acres. | 1:10:40 | |
But now we have all together | 1:10:46 | |
that we steward about 500 acres, 530. | 1:10:51 | |
And 400 of that is owned | 1:11:06 | |
by the nonprofit? | 1:11:08 | |
- | Yeah, and there's 10 acres deep, | 1:11:10 |
there's legally right now 380 | 1:11:13 | |
because 10 acres of that land | 1:11:18 | |
is still owned by the original woman, | 1:11:21 | |
she's a lesbian, Diane Rivers. | 1:11:26 | |
She's off-skill artist. | 1:11:31 | |
She owns spot | 1:11:34 | |
and 10 acres over there | 1:11:35 | |
until her death. | 1:11:37 | |
Upon her death it was put in my name | 1:11:40 | |
and Miguela's name. | 1:11:45 | |
- | That's complicated enough isn't it? | 1:11:52 |
- | It is complicated, | 1:11:57 |
so that's why I don't remember | 1:11:59 | |
the exact and everything | 1:12:01 | |
because it's complicated like that. | 1:12:01 | |
There's that 10 acres | 1:12:06 | |
and the extra land that we bought, | 1:12:08 | |
and I can't remember how much that was, | 1:12:11 | |
20 to 30 acres? | 1:12:12 | |
To me it was just our spring, | 1:12:14 | |
it was the land that our spring was, | 1:12:16 | |
and it was a parcel. | 1:12:19 | |
My memory isn't as good as it used to be. | 1:12:25 | |
- | Well I'm gonna send you, | 1:12:29 |
I'm gonna email. | 1:12:29 | |
Is it better for me | 1:12:30 | |
to mail it in the snail mail, | 1:12:31 | |
print it and mail it? | 1:12:32 | |
Or email it to you? | 1:12:33 | |
- | What? | 1:12:37 |
- | These notes? | 1:12:38 |
I'm taking notes, | 1:12:38 | |
and I'll go back to listen to this. | 1:12:40 | |
And try to correct everything | 1:12:44 | |
but I'm gonna need you to check spellings | 1:12:45 | |
and make sure I heard that | 1:12:48 | |
and all that kind of thing. | 1:12:49 | |
And when you look at that, | 1:12:50 | |
you may just wanna cross stuff out | 1:12:52 | |
or write stuff in. | 1:12:55 | |
So if send it to you in hard copy, | 1:12:57 | |
I can do both. | 1:13:01 | |
I can send you a hard copy | 1:13:02 | |
and email it. | 1:13:03 | |
Do you have access to a printer? | 1:13:05 | |
- | I can read it online | 1:13:09 |
but I don't have a printer. | 1:13:11 | |
- | So I'll send you a hard copy | 1:13:13 |
that you can work on. | 1:13:14 | |
- | I'd appreciate that. | 1:13:17 |
- | Yeah that's what I'll do. | 1:13:19 |
You wanted to talk about the mission today. | 1:13:24 | |
- | Today, yes. | 1:13:30 |
Our mission today I feel is still, | 1:13:31 | |
to be a sanctuary | 1:13:39 | |
for all this land to be a sanctuary. | 1:13:40 | |
Not only for people, | 1:13:42 | |
for women and children. | 1:13:43 | |
In priority, women and children of color. | 1:13:48 | |
But for this land | 1:13:55 | |
because it's so incredible forest | 1:13:55 | |
that has elk and bear, | 1:14:00 | |
and wild turkey | 1:14:03 | |
and every kind of animals, | 1:14:05 | |
wolves and we even have panthers here. | 1:14:07 | |
We have deep woods and dear, | 1:14:11 | |
and all of the small animals. | 1:14:15 | |
And not only that | 1:14:18 | |
incredible sauna of plants, | 1:14:21 | |
of wild mecidinal plants | 1:14:24 | |
that are rare in the world. | 1:14:26 | |
And ginseng, goldens-spiral, and ef-an-asian, | 1:14:30 | |
black cohosh and blue cohosh, | 1:14:35 | |
and so many basic medicines | 1:14:39 | |
that grow here is to protect it. | 1:14:43 | |
And I pray that we still haven't gotten that done. | 1:14:47 | |
I went to the University of Arkansas, | 1:14:50 | |
to get them to help us, | 1:14:53 | |
the law school. | 1:14:58 | |
A couple years I went there | 1:15:00 | |
and they started to help us | 1:15:02 | |
but at that time this land | 1:15:03 | |
was in dispute with Miguela. | 1:15:06 | |
And they felt there was | 1:15:15 | |
too many little things | 1:15:16 | |
that would happen | 1:15:18 | |
that they said | 1:15:21 | |
that they couldn't work on it anymore | 1:15:23 | |
because until things were settled. | 1:15:25 | |
We lost our IRS due to an error, | 1:15:30 | |
and our new secretary | 1:15:37 | |
that had taken over the job from Adela. | 1:15:39 | |
And doing some | 1:15:42 | |
of the administrative stuff. | 1:15:43 | |
She forget to turn in a form to IRS | 1:15:47 | |
for two years. | 1:15:51 | |
And on the third year | 1:15:53 | |
they sent a final notice. | 1:15:54 | |
And that's when she noticed it | 1:15:55 | |
and by the time she sent in the form, | 1:15:57 | |
we lost our 501. | 1:16:00 | |
So because of all these things, | 1:16:02 | |
the law school said | 1:16:07 | |
they couldn't continue | 1:16:08 | |
to work on it at this point. | 1:16:10 | |
But since then, | 1:16:14 | |
the IRS has reinstated us. | 1:16:15 | |
It was really a technical error | 1:16:19 | |
and the land dispute had been settled. | 1:16:25 | |
Not paid off but it's settled. | 1:16:28 | |
And I do hope to return back | 1:16:32 | |
to getting legal help | 1:16:35 | |
to put this land perpetuity. | 1:16:39 | |
As a a sanctuary for all those things | 1:16:42 | |
that I mentioned. | 1:16:45 | |
The springs that live here, for everything. | 1:16:47 | |
'Cause we are | 1:16:51 | |
one of the most pristine areas | 1:16:52 | |
that's not been logged. | 1:16:57 | |
In some areas ever, | 1:17:03 | |
some areas in the last hundred years | 1:17:05 | |
some areas were selectively large | 1:17:08 | |
and so I think the land protected | 1:17:12 | |
is a major top-of-the-list. | 1:17:16 | |
Because without protecting the land | 1:17:21 | |
then those that come are not protected, | 1:17:24 | |
that come to live here. | 1:17:28 | |
And then to create a stewardship act | 1:17:30 | |
and I have written up a draft | 1:17:38 | |
of the declaration of Aguiles. | 1:17:40 | |
That indigenous will (dog barking) and work off | 1:17:44 | |
as a guideline | 1:17:56 | |
for how to care for this land | 1:17:58 | |
for future generation. | 1:18:01 | |
So it's a very complex thing | 1:18:03 | |
that I've really taken very very seriously | 1:18:06 | |
as a sacred responsibility. | 1:18:08 | |
And so our mission now is | 1:18:12 | |
to hear our community. | 1:18:19 | |
Our local community, | 1:18:21 | |
our Ozark community, | 1:18:23 | |
and our indigenous community. | 1:18:26 | |
And to bring all the colors into a sacred meeting again. | 1:18:30 | |
- | Oh wow, that is ambitious. | 1:18:40 |
- | Yeah that's pretty damn ambitious | 1:18:44 |
and don't know where it came from. | 1:18:47 | |
But these answers-your-sheer twice the system with me. | 1:18:48 | |
Always say that they call them back. | 1:18:54 | |
And knew exactly who they dealing this. | 1:18:57 | |
That they see | 1:19:00 | |
what person would persevere | 1:19:01 | |
in spite of all obstacles | 1:19:06 | |
that I have faced. | 1:19:08 | |
I have helped song, | 1:19:10 | |
that we as the daughters | 1:19:14 | |
of the earth | 1:19:16 | |
of the indigenous women | 1:19:19 | |
of the earth here, | 1:19:20 | |
to maintain that leadership role. | 1:19:23 | |
And do whatever what we have | 1:19:29 | |
to do in this white world | 1:19:31 | |
that we live in. | 1:19:33 | |
This society that we live in, | 1:19:34 | |
and it's very hard for me | 1:19:36 | |
as an uneducated woman. | 1:19:39 | |
I only went to the seventh grade | 1:19:42 | |
and everything else has been, | 1:19:44 | |
and I've gathered the rest | 1:19:47 | |
of the knowledge. | 1:19:50 | |
Got my GED just by going to night school | 1:19:52 | |
and when I was very young. | 1:19:58 | |
But still don't have same resources | 1:19:59 | |
from that epidemic area | 1:20:05 | |
that I think is required. | 1:20:08 | |
But I do have the perseverance | 1:20:11 | |
and the vision. | 1:20:15 | |
So I pray that | 1:20:16 | |
if this is what the Adventist | 1:20:19 | |
has called me back to do, | 1:20:21 | |
that I will be able to do that, | 1:20:24 | |
I see the importance | 1:20:26 | |
to me when I travel. | 1:20:28 | |
- | Wow. | 1:20:34 |
- | Did you know that Central Park, New York City? | 1:20:36 |
I was walking through Central Park | 1:20:40 | |
and long ago | 1:20:42 | |
and somebody was telling me, | 1:20:44 | |
it was a woman, | 1:20:45 | |
an old woman. | 1:20:49 | |
That had the vision. | 1:20:51 | |
That held on to that land, | 1:20:52 | |
to be a spay. | 1:20:57 | |
That was preserved for the community | 1:20:59 | |
and it is, | 1:21:02 | |
and it's still there. | 1:21:03 | |
They're still using it, | 1:21:05 | |
and people are still enjoying | 1:21:07 | |
an incredible beauty there | 1:21:11 | |
in the middle of the city. | 1:21:12 | |
- | Say that again, | 1:21:15 |
a woman had the vision of Central Park. | 1:21:16 | |
- | She was the owner. | 1:21:20 |
- | Huh? | 1:21:25 |
- | That's what I was told. | 1:21:25 |
When I was in New York many moons ago, | 1:21:26 | |
it was a long time ago. | 1:21:28 | |
I never researched it myself. | 1:21:31 | |
But I was told by a local from New York. | 1:21:33 | |
That I think it was one | 1:21:38 | |
of our original board members | 1:21:39 | |
was from New York City. | 1:21:41 | |
And think it might have been her | 1:21:47 | |
that was telling me | 1:21:49 | |
that this old woman had owned | 1:21:50 | |
that property long ago. | 1:21:53 | |
And put it in a trust | 1:21:57 | |
to be preserved as a park. | 1:21:58 | |
- | Wow. | 1:22:02 |
- | So we as women, | 1:22:07 |
we are the daughters. | 1:22:09 | |
We know the sacredness of life, | 1:22:12 | |
that we know. | 1:22:15 | |
I've given birth, | 1:22:17 | |
I know the pain | 1:22:18 | |
and the love that it requires | 1:22:19 | |
to have a child. | 1:22:23 | |
And we know more like our Mother Earth. | 1:22:27 | |
We are more like her | 1:22:29 | |
because she gives birth to us everyday. | 1:22:30 | |
Births us and gives life. | 1:22:34 | |
And so in the matriarchal indigenous way, | 1:22:37 | |
it is the women | 1:22:42 | |
that is responsible for the care | 1:22:44 | |
and the ownership of stewardship | 1:22:47 | |
of the land. | 1:22:51 | |
And that's what I think it is important | 1:22:53 | |
right now when we see what destruction | 1:22:56 | |
has happened to our earth | 1:22:59 | |
by making the earth as a commodity. | 1:23:03 | |
We bought, and sold, | 1:23:08 | |
and raped, and pillaged | 1:23:09 | |
for her resources. | 1:23:12 | |
Because I think we'll never have an understanding | 1:23:19 | |
as great as women will | 1:23:23 | |
of the sacredness of our earth, oh-Megan. | 1:23:27 | |
- | Wow. | 1:23:37 |
- | And my name is Mel Avila. | 1:23:43 |
When I died that first time, | 1:23:48 | |
I was given the name as SunHawk, clear vision. | 1:23:51 | |
But about three years ago | 1:23:57 | |
when this happened, | 1:23:59 | |
this changed, this big transition. | 1:24:00 | |
I earned my eagle feathers. | 1:24:04 | |
I had earned enough eagle feathers | 1:24:08 | |
that I became eagle, | 1:24:10 | |
so Aguila means eagle. | 1:24:12 | |
SunHawk is my medicine name, | 1:24:17 | |
and now my medicine name is Aguila. | 1:24:21 | |
Although so many people know me as SunHawk | 1:24:24 | |
for 30 years, | 1:24:29 | |
35 years they knew me as SunHawk. | 1:24:31 | |
That I let them call me whatever. | 1:24:35 | |
I have a teacher, | 1:24:39 | |
she's a Aztec woman, | 1:24:44 | |
and she gave me an eagle feather | 1:24:48 | |
and a hair dress, | 1:24:51 | |
and said, | 1:24:53 | |
"Now take all your eagle feathers | 1:24:55 | |
"And put them into this head dress | 1:24:56 | |
"and wear it. | 1:24:57 | |
"Because now you're an eagle. | 1:24:58 | |
An eagle is spirit, | 1:25:02 | |
and brings message from spirit | 1:25:04 | |
to the earth. | 1:25:06 | |
- | How do you spell Aguila? | 1:25:14 |
- | A-G-U-I-L-A. | 1:25:18 |
And if you put it in spell check | 1:25:23 | |
it'll put the little mark | 1:25:28 | |
where it belongs. | 1:25:29 | |
- | Oh really okay. | 1:25:31 |
- | Put the accent mark where it belongs. | 1:25:33 |
The typing and you can change from language, | 1:25:36 | |
did that change from English. | 1:25:39 | |
Spanish was my first language | 1:25:42 | |
until I went to first grade. | 1:25:46 | |
I'm Spanish (laughs). | 1:25:49 | |
My sentences are often reversed | 1:25:55 | |
because when you write in Spanish | 1:25:58 | |
or speak in Spanish, | 1:26:01 | |
you begin a sentence almost the opposite | 1:26:03 | |
we do in English. | 1:26:06 | |
Don't worry to write | 1:26:10 | |
because the way I think. | 1:26:11 | |
And the vision now is | 1:26:24 | |
to get some young blood here. | 1:26:25 | |
Hand over, my Spanish here now | 1:26:29 | |
our son was in the Coastguard | 1:26:33 | |
for three years, | 1:26:35 | |
and he came back. | 1:26:37 | |
And really is just him and I | 1:26:39 | |
that are living here right now. | 1:26:40 | |
And my daughter lives about 25 miles from here. | 1:26:43 | |
She has a cabin here | 1:26:46 | |
and she told me last week | 1:26:48 | |
that she's thinking | 1:26:49 | |
of moving back with her partner. | 1:26:51 | |
So it's interesting how things are. | 1:26:58 | |
And I have an apprentice | 1:27:01 | |
that is thinking about moving here, | 1:27:01 | |
a young women. | 1:27:04 | |
I'm a lodge keeper. | 1:27:06 | |
This is a spiritual land, | 1:27:09 | |
I probably have never said | 1:27:13 | |
that in this statement | 1:27:15 | |
but this is a spiritual land. | 1:27:17 | |
And we do ceremonies here year-round. | 1:27:21 | |
And people come here for spiritual healing. | 1:27:24 | |
And I run a spiritual medicine lodge | 1:27:28 | |
which is why people call it a sweat lodge. | 1:27:32 | |
And she's gonna punish-me with me | 1:27:38 | |
for three years | 1:27:40 | |
and she is going to start pouring water | 1:27:42 | |
this Saturday in my place. | 1:27:44 | |
Which is the lodge when people come. | 1:27:50 | |
And we're having a ceremony. | 1:27:57 | |
You've heard Dia de los Muertos? | 1:27:58 | |
- | Yes. | 1:28:00 |
- | The Day of the Dead. | 1:28:01 |
Well we're having our ceremony on November 1st, | 1:28:02 | |
it's the last day | 1:28:04 | |
of the day of the dead. | 1:28:06 | |
And we'll have a ceremony | 1:28:10 | |
and talk about our ancestors | 1:28:11 | |
and all that. | 1:28:13 | |
And we'll have a lodge | 1:28:14 | |
and she will begin pouring. | 1:28:15 | |
Because my back | 1:28:19 | |
and I still do it. | 1:28:20 | |
And probably will continue to do it | 1:28:26 | |
but it's time for her | 1:28:28 | |
to start handling the rod | 1:28:29 | |
in the lodge. | 1:28:34 | |
It requires strength in your hand | 1:28:36 | |
and your sitting on the ground. | 1:28:39 | |
And it can strain my back. | 1:28:44 | |
And I'm a master massage therapist, | 1:28:47 | |
so I use my hands quite a bit, | 1:28:49 | |
and I have | 1:28:52 | |
to be more gentle with my body | 1:28:54 | |
as I go into my 60s now. | 1:28:58 | |
I've worked very hard with my body. | 1:29:08 | |
- | Oh that reminds me, | 1:29:13 |
do you have any objection | 1:29:16 | |
to having us archive this interview | 1:29:17 | |
with the Sally Bingham Center | 1:29:20 | |
for Women's History and Culture | 1:29:23 | |
at Duke University? | 1:29:24 | |
- | Which what? | 1:29:30 |
- | We have an arrangement with Duke University | 1:29:33 |
to archive these interviews. | 1:29:38 | |
- | Oh no that's fine. | 1:29:42 |
- | To do that, | 1:29:44 |
I'm gonna have to have you sign a form | 1:29:45 | |
that they have. | 1:29:47 | |
It asks for, | 1:29:49 | |
I've got your name, address, | 1:29:52 | |
and telephone number. | 1:29:54 | |
I wants your date of birth. | 1:29:55 | |
Can you tell me that | 1:29:57 | |
and I'll send this to you when I send the notes? | 1:29:59 | |
- | It's 10-17-1953. | 1:30:03 |
- | Okay. | 1:30:06 |
- | When you said that I was thinking, | 1:30:10 |
the only university | 1:30:12 | |
that I worked with is Berkeley. | 1:30:14 | |
They had me teach there a couple | 1:30:16 | |
of years ago. | 1:30:19 | |
I was asked | 1:30:22 | |
to teach three different classes | 1:30:23 | |
just for one day. | 1:30:26 | |
But I think it was Cal Berkeley. | 1:30:30 | |
I understand what you're saying now. | 1:30:37 | |
No that's fine, | 1:30:39 | |
I do wish for this | 1:30:40 | |
to be archived, I do. | 1:30:42 | |
- | That's what our whole larger project is about, | 1:30:45 |
this particular focus right now is the land. | 1:30:49 | |
The women's land | 1:30:52 | |
but the larger project is just | 1:30:53 | |
to try to collect as many as possible memoirs | 1:30:54 | |
and interviews to tell the stories | 1:30:59 | |
of what was going on in the South. | 1:31:03 | |
So many have not been told | 1:31:06 | |
or in newsletters that nobody knows about. | 1:31:08 | |
We're collecting a way more information | 1:31:15 | |
than we're gonna be publishing. | 1:31:17 | |
When I send you these interview notes, | 1:31:22 | |
they're gonna be probably 10 times as long | 1:31:23 | |
as the article we're actually | 1:31:27 | |
we're gonna be able to write from it. | 1:31:28 | |
The interview that we publish, | 1:31:31 | |
but I'll start by getting straight | 1:31:32 | |
the whole story | 1:31:35 | |
that will then be archived, | 1:31:36 | |
and then I will start trying | 1:31:39 | |
to work it into | 1:31:40 | |
what will make a good story | 1:31:41 | |
for the sinister wisdom. | 1:31:43 | |
And as we work together | 1:31:45 | |
we'll get something out of it. | 1:31:47 | |
- | It's hard to do this work. | 1:31:59 |
- | Yes it is. | 1:32:06 |
I've really enjoy talking, | 1:32:15 | |
meeting people. | 1:32:20 | |
And I'm really thinking, | 1:32:23 | |
I wanna try to figure out how | 1:32:24 | |
to get to Arkansas. | 1:32:27 | |
I've never been in it, | 1:32:28 | |
I've just sort of been through Arkansas, | 1:32:29 | |
I live in Alabama. | 1:32:32 | |
But I'd really love to visit that land | 1:32:36 | |
and talk to you more. | 1:32:37 | |
And I've got the website | 1:32:39 | |
so I can see you have events, | 1:32:40 | |
maybe I can plan a trip. | 1:32:43 | |
- | Yeah just let me know | 1:32:50 |
so that we can coordinate it | 1:32:53 | |
because right now I do have my parents. | 1:32:55 | |
I will travel back and forth, | 1:32:58 | |
but I'm mostly here 90% of the time. | 1:33:01 | |
I am here sometimes, | 1:33:06 | |
things come up | 1:33:10 | |
and I have to leave. | 1:33:12 | |
- | They're in Texas? | 1:33:16 |
You're parents are in Texas? | 1:33:21 | |
- | Yes they're in South Texas. | 1:33:23 |
- | Long drive. | 1:33:25 |
- | They live north of the border, | 1:33:26 |
about 125 miles north | 1:33:28 | |
of the Mexican border. | 1:33:31 | |
- | They must be in their 80s by now? | 1:33:35 |
- | Yeah they are. | 1:33:38 |
- | Well okay do you think, | 1:33:44 |
I think we got what we can use | 1:33:45 | |
for now anyway. | 1:33:48 | |
And if I do come | 1:33:50 | |
and try to do a longer interview with a book. | 1:33:52 | |
We wanna do a book from this material, | 1:33:56 | |
we have more material than we can put | 1:33:58 | |
in a special issue of any magazine. | 1:33:59 | |
So I'm hoping a book will come out this. | 1:34:04 | |
And I really enjoy meeting the people | 1:34:06 | |
and getting them to tell their stories, | 1:34:09 | |
so I hope we can do this in person. | 1:34:11 | |
- | You have been very lovely, | 1:34:15 |
you are gracious. | 1:34:18 | |
I can hear the kindness in your voice. | 1:34:24 | |
I appreciate that you are considering us | 1:34:27 | |
and remember us. | 1:34:32 | |
- | I appreciate the time you've spent with this. | 1:34:34 |
And I hope | 1:34:37 | |
that we can get it all pull together in time | 1:34:38 | |
and I'll stop now, | 1:34:44 | |
and I'll start working on these notes | 1:34:45 | |
so I can mail it to you, | 1:34:48 | |
tomorrow or the next day I'll mail it. | 1:34:50 | |
- | Well you take care of yourself. | 1:34:53 |
- | You too, thank you so much. | 1:34:54 |
- | Adios. | 1:34:57 |
- | Adios, buh-bye. | 1:34:58 |
(end of interview) | 1:35:02 |
Item Info
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