- See? See my rogue's gallery? Caught all these women's squeezing Charmin Bathroom Tissue. Uh oh, there's two more! 

- I always squeeze Charmin. 

- Charmin's so squeezably soft, it's irresistible! 

- Oh! Deep down, squeezably soft. 

- Soft fragrance, too. 

- Ladies, please don't squeeze the Charmin. He who squeezes Charmin ends up in my rogue's gallery. 

- Mr. Whipple! 

Photographer: Say cheese! 

Customer: Please don't squeeze the Charmin.